“Elf on the Shelf: Rejected Scenarios”
December 24th, 2012

“Elf on the Shelf: Rejected Scenarios”

Melissa and I just started reading the “Elf on the Shelf” to Olivia a few weeks ago and placing the elf in new locations around the house every morning as explained in the book…and it is pretty fun! I am of course a book snob, which definitely includes children’s books, so I never even bothered to look at this book before. Melissa heard from another parent at Olivia’s school what it was about (that the elf watches you for Santa and reports to him every night, and then your child gets to wake up and look for him/her the next day), and we knew that Olivia would have a blast with it. She named her elf, “Elf,” and since that first day has found her flying on a ceiling fan in a stolen invisible jet (from an angry Wonder Woman), driving a Hello Kitty scooter with Spiderman riding with her, sleeping in a tissue box bed, drawing mustaches on our family photo, etc. But she has yet to find the elf in the situations outlined above, which I am hoping that in years to come when it gets harder and harder to find new ways to present the elf that Melissa will relent to use one of these. The “Elf in Carbonite” was derived from a trick my brother Doug showed me right after “Return of the Jedi” came out in 1983, which involved (1) taking my little used Han Solo action figure, (2) putting him in a Styrofoam dixie cup, (3) filling it with water over his head, (4) putting him in the freezer for a couple of hours, then (5) removing him from freezer and tearing the cup away to reveal (6) Han Solo in an actual ice cube carbonite! Pure Genius! And I don’t think the “Elf Avalanche” or the “Elves Sucks” scenarios would cause any real lasting emotional damage to Olivia…”Elf Lost at Sea” is a much harder one to sell, it might have to be saved for years from now when Olivia’s belief in “Elf” wanes and the elf needs a dramatic end to her storyline…


Thank you to everyone who has been voting for “Clumsy Love” on “Top Web Comics,” I am hoping to get it into the top 100 some day!:

Thanks again, and see you Wednesday!

–Mike Gray

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